学帮9axl 发表于 2016-12-31 19:56:37

家长到底要不要培养孩子的特长?

<section data-tools="135编辑器" data-id="86037" style="max-width: 100%; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><section style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"></span></p><section style="box-sizing: border-box; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><section class="Powered-by-XIUMI V5" style="   box-sizing: border-box; " powered-by="xiumi.us"><section class="" style=" margin-top: 10px; margin-left: 30%; line-height: 1em;box-sizing: border-box; "><section class="" style="display: inline-block; vertical-align: middle; box-sizing: border-box;"><section style="width: 12px; height: 12px; box-sizing: border-box;"><section style=" transform: rotate(45deg); -webkit-transform: rotate(45deg); -moz-transform: rotate(45deg); -o-transform: rotate(45deg); box-sizing: border-box;"><section style="width: 12px; height: 12px; border-style: solid; border-width: 2px 0px 0px 2px; border-color: rgb(249, 110, 87); box-sizing: border-box; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 254);"></section></section></section></section></section></section><section class="Powered-by-XIUMI V5" style="   box-sizing: border-box; " powered-by="xiumi.us"><section class="" style=" margin-bottom: 10px;box-sizing: border-box; "><section class="" style="border-top-width: 2px; border-top-style: solid; border-top-color: rgb(249, 110, 87); border-bottom-width: 2px; border-bottom-style: solid; border-bottom-color: rgb(249, 110, 87); margin-top: -0.46em; margin-bottom: 0.1em; box-sizing: border-box;"><section class="Powered-by-XIUMI V5" style="box-sizing: border-box;" powered-by="xiumi.us"><section class="" style=" text-align: center;box-sizing: border-box; "><section class="" style="text-align: left; color: rgb(249, 110, 87); box-sizing: border-box;"><section style="box-sizing: border-box;">点击上方“公众号”可以订阅哦</section></section></section></section></section></section></section></section><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">很多孩子从小练习各种乐器,绘画或者跳舞,但是真正能够坚持下来的并不多,大多孩子都是半途而废了。其实这是大人的问题,不是孩子的问题。因为大人从思想上都不清楚,到底为什么要让孩子学一样特长,目的是培养孩子什么能力。</span></p></section></section><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">其实,我们不是为了培养孩子一种特长而让孩子去学什么东西,能不能学出名堂也并不重要。我们是为了培养孩子一种生活能力而去学习。我们要在培养孩子拥有一种特长的同时,培养孩子克服困难,抵御诱惑,战胜不良情绪,提高自己的做事的毅力等等一些做人的优良品质。</span></p><p></p><section data-tools="135编辑器" data-id="88594" style="max-width: 100%; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><section style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><section style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><section style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><section data-bcless="darken" style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"></section></section><section style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; text-align: center;"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><strong style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%; color: rgb(255, 41, 65); box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">父母的态度决定了孩子的态度</span></strong></span></p></section></section></section></section><p></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">我带孩子学琴的时候,就听很多大人抱怨批评孩子:“我容易吗?每周都要带你来练琴,耽误我很多时间,你还不好好练习,还花那么多钱,值得吗?你要不愿意练,就不要练了。”</span></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">大人说这种话,孩子会怎么想?他们一定想:本来我就不想练,还不是为了你们,是你们逼我学这个没有意思的东西。作为孩子他们根本就不知道为什么大人要让他们学这个。甚至大人自己都不清楚,为什么要逼孩子学这个东西。很多父母都是看人家孩子学,然后就让自己孩子学。</span></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">至于学习的目的是什么,父母自己都不清楚,怎么能怪孩子不能坚持呢。如果一个人都不知道自己为什么要做一件事情,他怎么可能会坚持呢?</span></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">要知道这个世界没有人会喜欢去做很辛苦,很枯燥,很需要耐力去完成的事情。因此大人的这种思想传达给孩子的,就是大人本来也不耐烦,也不知道为什么要让孩子学,因此孩子很高兴放弃。这个时候大人就会以给孩子自由,实则是大人不愿意给自己找麻烦的心态,放弃了对孩子培养自我控制能力和毅力的机会。</span></p><p></p><section data-tools="135编辑器" data-id="88594" style="max-width: 100%; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><section style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><section style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><section style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><section data-bcless="darken" style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"></section></section><section style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; text-align: center;"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><strong style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%; color: rgb(255, 41, 65); box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">大人要明确让孩子学习的目的</span></strong></span></p></section></section></section></section><p></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; text-align: center; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">我知道学习钢琴很枯燥,一个小练习曲,一弹就是好几个月。但不管刮风下雨,我和女儿从来没有缺过课,我就是要让孩子体会,我做事情是很认真的,因为我要感染她懂得什么叫认真。每次老师给她上课,我都在旁边认真地作笔记。让她感觉到我很重视这个事情,也很尊重老师,这样她自然也会重视老师的意见和批评。</span></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">当她受电视节目诱惑,而想放弃练琴的时候,我就给她讲道理,告诉她学会控制自己以后有什么好处。我告诉她,其实不是她不能够战胜欲望,而是她需要一个方法学会当欲望来临的时候如何控制自己。任何事情都不是随便可以成功的,都是需要付出比别人多的努力。&nbsp;</span></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">我明确地告诉她,我不是想把她培养成一个钢琴家,而要培养她懂得学习一样东西从不会到熟练甚至到成功是一种什么体验,什么感觉,需要付出什么样的辛苦,要忍受什么样的寂寞和枯燥,要如何学会控制自己的欲望和情绪。因为这才是以后她最需要和别人竞争所具备的一种强大的内心支持和竞争力。</span></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">当我带孩子参加比赛时,我都告诉她,比赛结果不重要。重要的是我要让你知道,你拥有了资格,而即使这个资格也是你自己用了这么长时间奋斗出来的。</span></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">通过这个比赛,我还想让你知道一件事情,就是你看看这些参加比赛的孩子,你就知道,如此努力的人不是只有你一个,什么时候都会出现比你还强的人,因为他们比你还努力。</span></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">我不是要让她只为自己成为第一名高兴,我要让她为自己的努力和成长高兴,我要让她知道,她一切的努力都是为了她自己得到最大的快乐,而不是为了我。我告诉她,如果你能够发扬这种练习钢琴的毅力和体会,她以后的生活中不管干什么都会得到更多的成功和认可。</span></p><p></p><section data-tools="135编辑器" data-id="88594" style="max-width: 100%; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><section style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><section style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><section style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><section data-bcless="darken" style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"></section><section style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; text-align: center;"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><strong style="max-width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%; line-height: 1.6; color: rgb(255, 41, 65); box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">为了培养孩子一种生活能力而去学习</span></strong></span></p></section></section></section></section></section><p></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; text-align: center; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">我要说的是,我们不是为了培养孩子一种特长而让孩子去学什么东西。我们是为了培养孩子一种生活能力而去学习。</span></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">学习一种特长是培养手段,而不是培养目的。不一定孩子学的特长越多竞争力越强。而是我们要在培养孩子拥有一种特长的同时,培养孩子克服困难,抵御诱惑,战胜不良情绪,提高自己的做事的毅力等等一些做人的优良品质。</span></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">一个人能够成功,不是要具有某种特长,而是具有某种成功的素质,而这种素质的培养可以通过从小对孩子培养特长开始,当然更需要父母对自己的自我约束能力和严格要求。一个没有自控能力的父母无法培养出一个有自控能力的孩子。言传身教永远是教育孩子最好的方式。</span></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">其实,我并不赞同让孩子小时候随心所欲的快乐自由,什么都不管不是一种积极有效的教育方法。那种看似放任的教育,其实是家长的自我懈怠。教育孩子应该是一种外松内紧的方法,可以放任孩子的天真行为,但是不能放任孩子的思想教育。那种只抓学习不注意思想教育的方式,看上去严格,实际上是放任。</span></p><p style="margin-bottom: 10px; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;">如果你的孩子有注意力集中的特点,就去找一个可以发挥这个天赋的特长去培养他,比如下棋,训练他的观察力和思维能力等等。关键是你要明确目的,不是为了让他成为一个什么特长专家,而是要培养他成为一个有生存竞争力的人。</span></p><p style="max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%; font-size: 14px; box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important;"></span></p><p style="max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.6px; white-space: normal; font-family: -apple-system-font, &#39;Helvetica Neue&#39;, &#39;PingFang SC&#39;, &#39;Hiragino Sans GB&#39;, &#39;Microsoft YaHei&#39;, sans-serif; box-sizing: border-box !important; 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坚持很美 发表于 2018-8-8 22:35:03

楼主真是好人,东西很有价值!
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